There are times I feel like a ship on tumultuous seas rocking back and forth in a storm. I’m not sure if I should abandon the ship and try my chances or if I should continue to fight. The storm is dark, unrelenting and unpredictable. It beats against my bows with such angry force that I’m not sure what direction I’m heading, but I remain steady at the wheel and continue to be beaten by wave and wind. I steer in and out of madness not from within, but from without. Do I stay with the ship? Do I abandon? How long is the storm? These are the questions whirling in my gut and mind as the storm battles me outside of myself. Yet, I still steer toward an unknown destination, somewhere where I will find a beckoning lighthouse and welcoming shore. It is a hope cast out in the fury of a relentless, uncaring storm. It is part salvation and part rebellion in the face of such gusting animosity. Whatever my decision, I know I am whole and will survive. I will survive.
The terrible boat